27 June 2014

Frontin: Ophelia

This all comes from my recent experiences. No, in fact, lets go back even further. I was brought up in a pretty normal family. Both my parents have good stable jobs and provided a stable, loving and generous foundation to raise me in. By anyone's standards we are not rich. Far from it. But we get by and it just so happens we have family and friends who are. However, me growing up as the middle class only child that I am meant I watched my peers have quite a privileged upbringing. Fast forward to 2014 I admittedly have become spoilt, begging my parents for countless "necessities" in order to fit in. And now I face quite the predicament. What is it??? I hear you cry. Well, I think I'm wealthier than I am. I'm trying to, for all intensive purposes, "keep up with the Joneses". The consequences are dyer. I have a weekend job, blow all my money like I'm Rick Ross then proceed to be broke and in debt to my pissed off parents. So as I go forth further out of my depth, I'm slowly coming to the realisation that I'm doing it all wrong. I'm not rich, didn't to Cheltenham ladies college or Harrow, and I'm not the heir to my grandparents fortune. Nor am I in "Made in Chelsea", won the lottery and more importantly I'm not the person I'm trying so hard to be! Who am I trying to impress? Or kid for that matter? If it's my friends then that's sad. If it's complete strangers that's worse. Why do I believe that materialism and indulging in vast quantities of gluttony and the inevitable self loathing after is going to benefit me in the long run? Of course it's good to have standards and think of oneself on a higher level but if it's all for the short term and for show, you have nothing. And I'm not the only one who liaises with the jaded idea that the mulberry purse and £24 cocktail will lead to a glamorous and fulfilled life. Or, conversely the equally ludicrous notion of YOLO. But unless you're content with ending up on the street at age 24 because your parents and university have had enough of your shit-storm of a start to adulthood then I'd pipe the fuck down and start doing things properly. So that's my intention. It may be hard as I am possibly the laziest person to have existed, but I'll do my best. And just stop being something I'm not and find out who I really am. So peace out homies and if any of you are like me, let's get this shit together.

19 June 2014

How To : Survive Art School

I was practically a celebrity at art school. I didn't really get how 'normal' people handled it, as my day 2 day hustle consisted of hiding from the paparazzi, ignoring aggressive fans and turning down boyz. However I observed how everyone else did it. Thank me later ;)

1.) Drake who?

If you're going to art school and like Drizzy, burn ur albums kids. Hold back the urge to belt 'start- started- started frm da bottom now we here'. People we only judge you and label you as a rnb lover. Who wants that? Fite back the tears and be strong.I had to sit alone at lunch once cuz I was caught twerking in the bathrooms. :(..
 Your new favourite artists are : The Smiths (so unknown), Toro Y Moi (wavey) and some guy called Bob Marley (gotta appease the smokers!!!! lol ja bless).

2.)  Say yes to drugs

Have u heard of my m8 Frank?? Plz DON'T talk to him. heheheeheh!!!
There's this drug called MDMA which is really cool which Picasso obv dabbled in. You should definitely do a little bit before your life drawing class! Da model could turn into ur worst nitemare!! Just go with it and ride the wave.

 Like coffee at breakfast? Replace your caffeine fix with a little thing I like to call Coke (not da diet kind!).

3.) Ur badge is ur life

When you are at an institution of art (fuk that was smart) you will get a badge. It is essential to wear this at all times so people know ur an up n coming Damien Hirst. Be outside the box-- I sometimes wear it around my ankle or often as a belt. If you're feeling daring like I always do, whilst at an art gallery throw it on the floor. Not only is this an installation piece, it lets people know you mean business.

4.) Hello and Good(bi)

If someone asks 'how are you?' answer with a 'I'm bi curious, how are you?'.

Shit. You are immediately fucking David Bowie or something. I mean, everyone's doing it. My old time friend Cara Delevigne is now dating a girl which is so hot right now!! I always wear one hoop in my ear because it begs the question of 'is she a lezza?' lol.

5.) Be poetic

Making small talk isn't easy. I like to channel my other gd m8 back in 2000 called Shakespeare, and speak with a poetic flow.

'Do u eva stop and fink...why is the sky blue?'

'Sometimes I feel like this, like this little fuckin caterpillar waiting month by month to turn into a buttafly'


'To die by ur side, is such a heavenly way 2 die.'

Yeah, so there you have it. It's a pretty rough guide, but I guarantee you'll sail through da world of art school and its inhabitants!!


12 June 2014

gud trax

whts gucci ma killa
I thought I'd make a post about good music because I have nothing to say for myself that's worth readin. My life consists of being in debt, working unpaid 'jobs' and making scrambled eggs !! HEHE

1.) 'I OWN THIS $$HIT'

U will see me walking thru the streets- jeans baggy, swag turnt up, fux given ? zero. LOL. Big up Chingy, this is a classik.


When I'm smokin or on my balcony I listen 2 this and question God n shit!! Sometimes I pretend I'm getting with a guy to this song cuz it's pretty smooth ;)

3.) 'FUK'

I love this band. They look badass and they probably have had a beer in their lives. That's totally gnarly man!!

4.) 'Not black but I can kick it like Biggie!!! i <3 hip="" hop="" p="">

Probs should listen to this to look like you know about Basquiat's lyf. U cud go to Portobello with your mixed race friend and play this aloud on ur phone. Totally down wit it! ***

5.) ' peace n luv'

Think this is a pretty happy song. lurv it m8