This whole week my hayfever has been going ape shit. I rock that 'krusti nose ring' vibe. Ya feel me?
Sometimes I hope it looks like I'm snorting up left over Cocaine, 2 push further my t33nage rebellion. MUM N DAD PLZ DNT LOOK @ THIS.

I've pushed myself to go out. Went all the way to BARNES. I saw a couple of these 'we wear creepers n high sox!! kl!' year belows who laughed at me. AWKS. Instead of being cool I just walked forward and tripped on something. We met this dude at the pub who literally was the biggest load of boll0x. The convo went something like this..

'So like I went to China, last year, and you know when you get those, like, *flix hair* epiphany moments every 2, 3 years? Well, fuk, I got them eVERY DAY M8! This world is so small in comparison. Like, I'd be cycling amongst the little kiddies, SO HIGH  on some herbs and they'd be looking at me like all chilled, but it was fucking HILARIOUS cos they didn't have a clue in da world I was high as a kyt!!! Shit.'

'Wow. Awesome.. Who'd you go with?'

'My Dad. You know as well, we were all high, cos he's properly into weed, and like I'm on the toilet, and I'm CHiiiLLED like HIGH and I see this snake. This snake was like proper looking into my eyes as if he was gonna eat me so I started calling people you know?'

'Who the fuck did you call in India m8? Customer service?'

And so on it went..like that. P00R GUY. P00R US. Actually it was pretty hilarious.


  1. Do you serioulsly talk/type like that? Or do you act dumb for effect?

  2. I always try to lower my intelligence for effect for people like you! XOX

  3. Oh really? Well that's on going to get you very far, is it? You don't even know me, let alone how intelligent I am.

  4. I think the language used is really cool - like 'A Clockwork Orange' or 'Clueless'. It's partly taking the piss out of herself and partly taking the piss out of people who think teenagers do talk/ act like that.


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